Football with my Daddy

It's things like this that I treasure these days.  I'm sitting on my couch watching watching my Dad watching football.  He LOVES sports.  I realize that he's not as young as he used to be lately...and I just appreciate my time with him.  I've had friends who have lost parents lately and I'm so grateful to have mine.  Love him! Even love watching him flip channels.  Funny how things that used to drive you crazy turn into sweet memories as you get older.. 

Thank goodness for the weekend and grandparents!!

It's Saturday afternoon...a really special one.  Why is it special, you ask? Because "Me-maw and Papa" are here to visit us.  It's amazing to think I really got married 2 months ago, quit my stinky job a month and a half ago, found out about LifeVantage and started working with Michael a month ago, and "sold" my house a week ago.  It's been a whirlwind!!  Whenever my parents come, I feel like I can take an extra breath.  And I love it.  It's easier to breathe knowing that they're here to help and support me and I love getting to visit with them and lately  have found myself watching more closely when they talk and remembering every moment.  I love my parents.  They've really stepped up for me the last 3 years and I have a TON of respect for them and appreciate them more than they could ever know.  Not sure what I'd do without them!!!  I don't want to find out.

One thing for sure..I cannot wait for this economy to pick up.  Michael has such an awesome job, but it's hard with the economy right now,  and I feel so guilty sometimes that I cannot find some way to instantly bring money into our home.  It's hard having Caitlyn and no degree.  A minimum wage job would not do any good...my kids would be stranded all of the time and we'd spend what I made in daycare.  It's exciting to have found LifeVantage though.  I'm excited and hopeful and treating it like a business like it is.  Researching, learning, and learning to just have fun and enjoy it!  I love the product, which helps SO much.  It's changing Michael's life for the better, and mine too...and it's been fun to hear stories after just 2 weeks (not even) of how it's helping others as well.  I'll do what it takes to make sure we're successful.  Being with my kids is my number one goal.  I miss them too much when we're not together and they're growing so fast! 

Speaking of weekends and grandparents...I think it's time for an afternoon coffee break with Mom.  It's the little things in life that makes it worth it... 

<3  Deanna

A little of this and a lot of that...

First off, it's 5:55 on a Saturday morning and I have now been up for almost an hour.  I cannot sleep.  I got news this morning that a dear friend of mine was in a car accident and I'm sitting here wondering what her world must look like right now.  Yesterday I was whining and griping about how my life isn't fair sometimes, and yet I have 3 beautiful children, am engaged to an awesome guy, and have more blessings than I deserve.  I have a roof over my head, clothes on my body, and parents who have basically taken me and the kids under their wings the last 3 years.  What a big baby I was acting like!!  Why do we do that?  It's sad how something so horrible has to snap us back into our reality and remind us of our blessings.  I am ever so sorry for thinking and feeling the things I did yesterday.  All I can do is sit here and pray for the family of my friends.  I won't go into the deets.  Just know.  They aren't good. 

As for being accountable to my workout plan. I have stuck with it!! I'm actually really proud of myself for that.  I'm on Day 9 now and it's a REST day.  I like the sound of that!  Even yesterday, when I was Pouty McPoutface, I forced myself through the workout and it did help bring me out of the funk...at least a little bit.  I am feeling much more energetic everyday and I feel like maybe can feel my strength building.  That feels great!  Turbo Fire is definitely an intense workout and makes me sweat more than anything I've ever done before, but it is never boring and keeps me on track...so I love it!  Highly recommend.  But it's not for the faint of heart.  I would recommend doing Turbo Jam first if you're just getting back into shape. 

Lastly - If you're a parent. - WHY do kids get SO crazy in the summer?!?!  I'm about to pull my hair out over here.  If only I had their energy.  Let's just put it that way.  It's been so hot that we have kind of been stuck indoors.  My request is for more free indoor activities so parents can not totally lose their minds. Is that asking too much?  No. In all seriousnness, I'm just thankful that my children are most obviously happy and healthy.  They have tons of energy and actually you can tell that they know they are loved.  They're amazing kids.  Even if they are slightly hyper sometimes.  :)

TurboFire Day 4

So today I start Day 4 of my 90 day journey!  I'd take pics and all that, but my camera seems to be broken. I'm so disappointed. Or maybe not. :)  So far, I'm LOVING TurboFire.  It is so energizing and fun!  I'm anxious to see what happens to myself as I go on this journey.  No. I'm not in horrible shape. But I'm definitely getting to a point of getting onto a slippery slope...plus I need to look FAB at my wedding next month!!  Anything less would just be unacceptable!  The journey for me is about SO much more than being in shape..it's about getting back to ME.  I need to regain my self-esteem and energy and pride in myself.  Somehow that has gone away...hmm...wonder why.  So I'm digging my heels in and COMMITTING to finish this!  I'm going to use this blog as an accountability partner to blog about where I'm at, what I think of the program and my results.  That being said...it's time to go let Chalene kick my tail!

http://beachbodycoach.com/fitmom23

Finding a New You!

After divorce, something that every woman (at least that I have met) struggles with are the phases that you go through.  You doubt yourself, your worth, you lose track of who you are or who you are going to be.  Are you the same person?  There is absolutely no one in this life that maintains the same exact person that they are in life.  Things happen.  People change.  It sounds trite, but it is oh so true.  I think the main thing that we MUST focus on as mothers and women and people in general is that the pain and hurt that we go through does not make us bitter, hateful people.  We have a choice to make every single day.  We can choose to live in the past and hold on...hear those negative voices that tell us we are not worthy, that we must hold our head down in shame over our past, or that we are responsible for the happiness of those around us, or we can choose to make a new life and a new version of ourselves.  I have recently realized that the past was holding me down like a 1,000 pound weight.  I carried the losses with me and let the past make me jaded and the guilt I felt over things I could have done better make me feel like less of a person.  I let this happen to the point that even going to a church was near impossible.  I was raised "right"...you know?  How could I have messed up my life so much?  Well...after much realizing and thinking, I realized that all you can do is hold your head high, find the best version of you, learn from your mistake and always strive to do better.  The last part of that is reaching out and knowing that you are not alone!  I'm not only finding a new me, I'm creating her...I'm creating the person the God wants me to be and my family needs me to be.  As I embark on the journey that is the next chapter in my life, I am choosing courage, commitment and joy.  I am choosing to be positive and open and find a way to use what I have been through to help others not have to go down that road, and if they find themselves in the same position, maybe, just maybe, they can see a ray of hope.  There's always tomorrow.  There's always another chance.  And if you reach out beyond yourself with courage, you will find that you are not alone.  Create the you that you can be proud of and love.  Most importantly, create the you that GOD knows you can be!  There's no greater joy in life than knowing you are living a Godly, rewarding, full life.  Make the choice.  Put the old, defeated, sad, regretful you in the past and take the step to find a new you!  I'm here for you!  We're all making that choice every day.  <3

 5 Things Blessing my life!  (I almost forgot!)

1. New found hope.  I am getting married again in almost exactly a month and this fills my life with joy! I'm so blessed to have my Michael.
2. TurboFire.  Yes. A workout.  Working out gives me not only strength, but peace of mind and a calm.
3. Watching my children grow in the Lord.  We're reading Max Lucado's "The Story" every night right now.  It's a blessing!
4.  The fact that I am gaining the 2 most awesome kids I have met (other than my own) as step-children.
5.  My parents.  They are my heart and my lifesavers. I could not have made it through this last year without them!

Days like today....

Seems like today has been a rollercoaster of a day.  Ever have a day that feels like it was 2 weeks long?? That was today for me! 

I woke up this morning motivated and excited to finish my final exam for becoming an MT.  Yes.  Me. Finally finishing something and doing something right for what feels like the first time. I'm the "Queen of Good Intentions" and always mean well, but it doesn't always end up the way that I intend.  I manage to get myself in the tightest spots sometimes.  BUT. This time..I did it!  I finished Medical transcription school and turned in my final exam today.  Now the waiting game begins....2 weeks to find out if I passed.  PLEASE God, let me have passed on the first try.  I am so looking forward to being employed and on my own finally.  I'm thinking it might be a bit late for a last minute prayer... I don't guess He'll change any of my wrong answers to make me pass if I didn't to begin with...;)  I do feel pretty good about it and mostly am proud of myself for making it completely through. I gave it my all and I am proud of me. 

Then comes the rest of the day....seemed like from the getgo I was fighting my kids for their attention.  I swear...sometimes I wonder if their ears work...but then they seem to hear every negative remark their sibling makes to come tell me about so I'm sure they do.  Somehow they just have a "Momma filter" to block me out!  We're doing great on day 4 of our read the Bible every night goal, but I'm going to have to spice it up.  Somewhere along the last 2 years, we forgot how to sit still, be quiet, and have a family devotional time.  It'll come. It's just new.  Right?  I'm determined to work on respect, manners, and treating others the way you would like to be treated.  I'm reclaiming my household as a house that's center is God...and we'll get there.  A day and a prayer at a time.

On a good note, I DID find an AWESOME bill desk at Hobby Lobby that I have to have!  I have my eye on it and no one better get it before I can! 

Another new goal....finish every blog with 5 blessings from my day...so here goes.

1. I got to spend the day with Mike.  He makes things bearable. ;)
2. Hal and Bubba both came in and kissed and hugged me before going with Daddy to dinner.  It made me feel loved.
3. I finished my test today and felt pretty good about it.
4. My car fits in my garage...that was done the other day, but it's still cool...
5. I love my little yappy chihuahua.  If I'm ever feeling alone, he's never far away to love on me and make me smile.  Even though he can be a brat. LOL!

2011, here I come!

So today is January 2.  The 2nd day of a brand new year.  I'm so very excited about that fact.  I know...it's just really another day in my life, but to me, it's the start of something new and exciting.  It's a fresh start for reflection and change.  So, although many people "hate resolutions" because they feel like they always just stop, I'm starting this new year with a motivation and fire to change my life.  I have realized that somehow, in the past 4-5 years, life started happening to me.  Starting now, I will happen to life!

My goals for this next year are goals that will make me a better person, and more of the person who God wants me to be!  That is my #1!  Here are my resolutions.  If I put them down..maybe it'll help me be accountable! ;)

1.  I bought a 1 year Challenge Bible for Kids.  My kids and I will be reading through the Bible in 1 year together.  We are going to realign our lives back to having Christ as our center.  We are going to be excited about our blessings and thankful for the love He gives us every day!

2. Tomorrow I take the test to become a certified MT.  I'm scared, excited, hopeful...scared...but I know that I will be OK!  It WILL be ok.  I have prepared for this, have God on my side and my family supporting me.  When I get certified, I then hope to be an awesome MT and be able to support my family and give back to those around me.

3. Continue paying off ALL of my debt. I am ALMOST there and am so excited to finish my goal this year! After that, it's time to begin to fix up my house and save for building a new, incredible David Weekley home.  :) Can't wait!

4. Make sure ALL of my friends and family KNOW how loved they are!!  Be open and loving and kind to those that I love and forgiving to those around me who I struggle with.